News

Baby or boob - Rachael's Story

12th October 2011

Unexpected lumps during pregnancy are never a good sign...

I was 18 weeks pregnant with my fourth child when I found a lump in my breast.  My GP at the time thought that it was only pregnancy related, but I asked for it to be checked.  I found out at 21 weeks that it was breast cancer.

I was 37 years old and lived in Hawkes Bay with my husband and our three girls aged 6, 3 and 1 ½.  At the time we had the house on the market and I worked part-time as a partner in a pharmacy. 

My mind boggled with so much information.   Initially I thought I might not be here by Christmas.   I was aware that I needed to think positively and stay away from negativity.  I had great support and lots of love from my family, my husband and friends.  With everything from prayers to practical support like doing meals and looking after the kids .  

Major decisions had to be made - the choice came down to either my baby or my boob!  We had to discuss having a stillbirth.  I couldn't have a lumpectomy and had to have the breast removed and chose not to have chemotherapy because of the baby.

At the time, I embraced everything to do with breast cancer.  I went to a conference in Rotorua with 500 women with breast cancer!  There was a 27yr old there, I thought that   if I felt ripped off, what about her?  I remind myself that there is always someone worse off than me.

YWCA Encore and self help 

During all of this I was given phone numbers of people who had information to share around breast cancer recovery.  Some of them had done an exercise and support programme called Encore that is run by the YWCA here in Hawkes Bay.  They recommended the programme and suggested that I enrol.

Since I couldn't stretch my arm or open a jam jar, I was very keen to do the programme straight after the surgery and didn't want to wait.  The coordinators were great, incredibly positive and helpful.  But  I was 37 and pregnant and with women who were all older than me so I I felt like I didn't belong. 

But I really got into the water exercises and enjoyed the speakers; nutritionist, lymphoedema expert and breast surgeon.   

Encore helped me to start to enjoy life again.   I decided to set goals with exercise and in April the following year I did a duathalon!   I have also improved my diet, and for family, less processed food, no plastics or microwave.  I've made lots of changes over the years but it's easy to start slipping back.  I try to stay informed, to make healthy choices and I do self help courses to stay healthy - I've recently learnt to meditate. 

Talking to others

I'm a private person.   When I first had cancer I didn't want people to gossip about me.  Is everyone looking? Do they know? Working in public environment as pharmacist it was difficult so I kept it to myself.   

I'm telling my story now so that I can help other women and share my experience.  I tell people not to worry until you have the results…there are so many different types and grades.  I encourage people not to go on the internet or to get bombarded with info.

And being on the breast cancer merry-go-round, its all so busy and then life goes back to normal.  Support is always crucial.  The biggest problem is that people don't know what to say.   I tell them that you don't have to say anything, just be there and offer any support you can.

I also put it behind me quickly and didn't keep going to groups - my spare time is for my family and my kids.  I haven't stayed in touch with the breast cancer groups, life is busy enough now and I want to move on.  The only thing in common was breast cancer, like a coffee group when you have kids!

But I always recommend the YWCA Encore exercise programme to women now.  Its not just the exercise that makes you feel better, they give you so many little bits of important information that helps too.

My inspiration

I'm lucky, I got my breast cancer early and it wasn't high grade.  It's taken four years to feel clear.  Any ailments over that time had me worrying that it could have spread. Over time I worry less, although it's still in the back of my mind.  I like to feel that it's over and I'm not going to get it again - the power of positive thinking!   Life is different now and I make the most of it. 

I'm 41 now; I've just been to WOW in Wellington with a girlfriend.  Having quality time with friends is important and I really appreciate it.  We have great family and friends support with our children who are now aged from 3 ½ to 10.  We have a typical family life, we both work part-time and have a nanny to help us with the children.

I now appreciate life more, this experience has made me look at life and I really do stop and smell the roses and feel the sunlight.  I'm walking around inhaling it!  Getting old is a privilege - I hear friends regretting turning 40 and I feel blessed for every year.

With me throughout this journey was my remarkable grandmother, Grannie Annie.  She had breast cancer when she was 60 and she was bringing up my sister and me, I was 12 at the time.   When I had breast cancer I asked her what it was like for her when she had it all those years ago.  She said "I wasn't going to let it beat me, I had to bring my girls up".  She kept her promise, she was always there for me and only just passed away last year at the wonderful age of 91.  She's my inspiration!

This article was just published in October 2011 Pink Magazine, Rachael was interviewed by Tilda Bostwick.